Ambiguity

Today i might tell you that i have decided on this but tomorrow, i might have set my mind on the total opposite. I recognise that nothing is absolute. I am the type that love to work single-mindedly once i am determined. To walk backwards and start over again is perceived to be a non-performer but the truth is, it's not the right train of thoughts. My inflexible and unaccomodating nature is probably the root of my grief at times. After acknowledging it, i can only continue to self-reflect on my judgements or actions and work from there onwards.

A few seconds ago, again i wonder what's my true aspiration. At the moment, i still have yet have a convincing answer. If only i have a magic ball. Here i contradict myself again, i have always believe that i am the only one who can and should paint my life the way i wanted. That's why i have never been able to persuade myself to go for a tarrot reading.

I have got another mail from Sandy! Receiving mail from her is always nice and uplifting. I think i am still very much a child. You know how it feels like to get something from your idol. That's exactly the feeling that i get whenever i get a mail from her. The best part is i am going to meet her in Ottawa soon. By doing so, i will probably end up having a mania over my love in surgery again. That sentence is as precise as it can be. Needless to repeat this over and over again, (without her), I could have strayed even further.

Mich, hope that you'll have a safe flight to Japan, the land that unexpectedly and successfully spellbounded me. I hope that you'll enjoy it as much as i did.





(-_-)***watashi wa nihon o aishiteru imasu